Category Archives: Food

A challenge!

So, I have access to a bunch of canned beans, and I don’t know what to do with them. But they should be eaten. Beans I have access to:

  • Baby lima
  • Black
  • Black-eye peas
  • Garbanzo
  • Great Northern
  • Kidney
  • Lentils
  • Navy
  • Pinto
  • Red
  • Split peas
  • White

I’m not a great cook, so I’d like to be able to prepare these with as few other ingredients as possible. How about we limit it to brown rice, fresh vegetables, milk, tortillas, spices, and/or … I don’t know, yogurt? Basically whatever I have in my fridge. No butter, no olive oil, no cheese, no pasta, no meat (obviously).

And if you need bait, here’s some amateur kitten porn:


And there is much more kitten porn where that comes from, if you know what I mean. If your suggestions are good enough, you could even get some live, in person, kitten cuddling time.

Edit: I just remembered that this song exists. Beans! Space Ghost!


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Filed under Food, Winston

Cherries aren’t very tasty.

We have a big magnificent perfect-for-climbing cherry tree in the back yard. In previous years we’ve slaved over this tree to earn a good harvest and I think that’s only worked … once? Like six years ago? There were always worms. So many worms.

This year, we completely ignored the tree. It doesn’t deserve our attention because it doesn’t treat us nicely. (Soon I’ll publish a children’s book about this to teach young girls about young boys. College students use metaphors.)

Since we stopped fawning over the tree, it realized that it has to pull it’s own weight, and this year we have an impressive harvest. Not very many birds, no worms at all (that I’ve seen), and the fruit is just beautiful. I haven’t seen any mutant cherry siamese-twins, which is nice because those are icky.

Then we realized that we don’t really like the taste of cherries. They’re actually kind of disappointing. Totally unacceptable!

I think I’m going to make this pie sometime this week, but if any of you a) have ideas about what I should do with the cherries, or b) want to come over and pick yourselves some free fruit, feel free to comment. With all the rain we’ve been having, I’m thinking cherry-time is only going to last another weekish. They’re at their reddest right this second.

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Filed under Food